Thursday, March 31, 2016

A few March questions for you... down to the wire!

We have questions!  Please, anyone, feel free to answer!

1.  Cock curvature curiosity: Right? Left? Straight as an Arrow?
2.  Spankings: Always erotic or sexual, even during punishment? Male answer? Female Answer?
3.  Weekly maintenance: yes or no?
4.  Ever try St. Andrew's Cross? If so, what did you do on it?
5.  Ever been to a club like the Citadel in San Francisco?
6.  Full, landing strip, square, Brazilian, bikini?
7.  Nicknames?
8.  Biggest turn on?
9.  Places spanked outdoors?
10.  The implement you'd beg for...?

Eric and Amy

(Our answers)

1.  Cock curvature curiosity: Arrow
2.  Spankings: Eric answer- Always erotic, especially on a bare bottom. Amy answer- never erotic during punishment; but a reset can become erotic.
3.  Weekly maintenance: yes or no? We think it might be good but aren't together consistently enough for any regularity.
4.  Ever try St. Andrew's Cross? If so, what did you do on it? We TOTALLY want to do this.
5.  Ever been to a club like the Citadel in San Francisco?  Our fantasy vacation; aside from Tahiti.
6.  Full, landing strip, square, Brazilian, bikini? Mix it up.
7.  Nicknames? Sweet Pea and Squishy Little Slut. Honey, Sweetheart, My Darling, Dawg
8.  Biggest turn on? Anticipation
9.  Places spanked outdoors? In the car. In the car a lot.
10.  The implement you'd beg for...? The belt. Agreed. The belt.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Lost and Running

I go to the shower, looking for solace, for peace.

Hot steamy water pours over my head,

mixing with salty tears that cascade across my cheeks

 and drop into the white fiberglass rectangle at my feet.

Bright yellow pee shoots into the tub

and suddenly I see a trail of red blood slither down my inner thigh

like a snake winding it's way from my core.

Symbolically, it is my heart,

the tip sliced open by a past I'm trying to leave behind

but one that a small town,

small minds,

won't let me forget.

The internal pain leaves me bleeding,

unseen and unheard,

in the lonely pool

of utter sadness.

I cry for eight days straight.

My toes are blistered from the miles I put on old tennis shoes.

There is a bottle in the trashcan outside and I'm relieved it is not in my room anymore, impressed at my resolve to be better than that, but shaking inside because the thought was there.

Eric returned today, "expecting to find you, only to find not you".

I wanted desperately to come across as carefree and busy. I rehearsed a few lines to throw him off course and figured if I could avoid him long enough, I'd get beyond the days he was gone and function normally again. I'm no actress. Eric knew, in a moment, that I was lost and running. He just didn't know why.

"Are you going to yell at me?" He was not the cause, but the event exasperated the situation and once again I thought it to death. I'm still not sure if there is an answer we can come up with that stops the madness in my brain while keeping the love between us. Some days I think, most days I think, I should make his life easier and push him away.

A mind reader, Eric told me that my pattern when I get triggered or thrown, is to dump everything in my life (good, bad or otherwise) and bolt. He thought I'd gotten better, moved beyond it. Perhaps today is the day we are both disappointed.

My fear eventually spoke out, my best friend finally home, and I took the time to share with him the darkest side of my mind, the one even I was shocked to discover.  When Eric left on his trip, I was strong, supportive and solid; we kissed goodbye in a parking lot and he surprised me with a bag of bunny m-n-m's. My confidence didn't last long. A day, maybe two.

I want to shut my brain down so I don't feel anymore and can just live like everyone else.  Eric said he'd spank me today, but not for the reason I think. I told him, he couldn't hit me hard enough to make the pain go away.  What a sorrowful statement.  "Not for a reset, honey. I'm mad at you for allowing people who don't matter to take away who you are." Who am I? Somebody tell me, please.

I draw my strength from feeling loved. I thrive on collaboration and teamwork. I get in the grove; working on projects, building relationships - and I fly when I can be creative with my lover.  During those times, I absolutely know I'm powerful and pretty and smart.

It never lasts very long though and then I hit a bump and suddenly it is a physical problem with the adrenaline and anxiety mixing in my veins to the point I can't see beyond the pain that incapacitates my ability to think anything but RUN.  I shed everything to flee, weightless and unencumbered, to fight the painful words in my head and the helpless feelings of desperation in my body.  Any sense of rejection, and fight or flight kicks in. I'm not a fighter. I am, Eric will attest, a flight risk.

"Why don't you do what makes you happy?"

The question is so simple and yet so hard for me to answer. "Things" don't make me happy. If I feel unloved, I can be doing the greatest thing in the world and won't enjoy it. When I feel loved, I can be at the bottom of deepest darkest most miserable cave and I'll still see the light and be willing to do anything to reach it.

Do what makes me happy... I don't even know what that is anymore.

Thursday, March 17, 2016

The Leather Belt Brings a New Spanking Sensation

"Get over my knee NOW," Eric said sternly, "Or we're skipping the warm-up and going straight for the belt."

We both knew this was coming. The spanking was inevitable.

Eric rolls up his sleeves for three reasons.
1. Erotic, playful spanking
2. Mental, reset spanking
3. Punishment, straighten up spanking

He was about to leave for two weeks, so I was getting all three.

1. Twenty one day medical restriction of "no sex" and the Chinese Eggplant appetizer a few nights ago had us both heated up.

2. Eric will be gone, without communication, for two weeks. Uh, ya, reset required. (More like "set up" than "reset". The reset will come when he returns.)

3. I went through an entire monologue on how I have always wondered what a real legitimate punishment spanking would feel like, explained that I crave both the emotional and physical side, pronounced the need for Eric to be mad at me so he can punish me so I can see that he still loves me even though it has never worked out that way in my past with anyone else, thus affording me the freedom to trust that I am worth sticking around for.

We were in our bedroom and I was wearing nothing but a thong.  Eric pulled out the spanking chair and as he prepared to start, I inquired why he was mad at me.

"I'm not," he answered.

"Then this won't work!" I stated. "If you aren't really mad then how will I know you still love me when you're not mad anymore?"

My brain.

My brain on female hormones.

Really?!  Was I really saying those words?

Eric cornered me and held tightly to my arms. He looked deep into my eyes and said, "I think the world of you. You still don't get that, do you?"

I literally lost myself in the sincerity of his voice. I couldn't breathe and searched his eyes looking for the catch.

"You have a lot of baggage," he stated and my thoughts grasped onto the negative voice in my head which reassured me, it was my baggage that was the catch. "but that's okay," he continued and the negative voice disappeared like magic, "as long as you don't spend your life looking in the review mirror."

Eric waited until I acknowledged his point.  And then, we began.

"Get over my knee NOW," he said sternly, "Or we're skipping the warm-up and going straight for the belt."

There is a solid intimacy in being across Eric's lap, his cock growing under my ribs and his palm reddening my ass one cheek at a time. He can talk, tug at my hair, hold my hand in place when I try to use it for cover; comforting actually.

The warm up ended and I became knees on the bench, butt in the air, body over the foot board of the bed. Eric struck out with his belt.  The slaps stung and clawed at my bare skin. I squirmed and yelped, gave into the pain and then danced around fighting the burn.

I scurried away at one point and then found myself draped over the chair, Eric threatening me to move my hands out of the way of the spanking I was to continue receiving.

My hands did not listen and WHACK, out of nowhere, the belt landed in a solid thud across my right shoulder blade and down my back. The sensation was INCREDIBLE. Eric held off, not knowing what I was thinking or experiencing.  I looked up into his face and beamed.

"I want more of that," I panted.

My tone and breathing was extremely convincing, because I meant it.

"You do, don't you?" he stated. "You want me to beat on your back, on your whole body, until you feel every inch come alive, don't you?"

Time seemed to stand still as I looked into Eric's bright blue eyes.

"Yes Sir," I replied.

Oh did Eric go to town on me. My pussy, tits, ribs, inner thighs, back, bottom, and quads.  Each strike held a different amount of pressure to it, some sensual and sexual, others biting and long lasting, still others quick but effective.  I loved everything he did. He loved everything he did.

In the end, my hands were bound with the belt and Eric was coming in my mouth.  Then, with a beautiful red heart drawn on my left cheek, we were both ready for a nap.

"Next time," Eric cooed in my ear as I drifted off, his body spooning mine between cool crisp sheets, "we use the flogger."

Two weeks.

I can't wait.


Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Lindy had questions for Eric

Eric what is your favourite implement to use on Amy?

We have a large toy box full of fun implements but my favorite one is the black belt, even though we have floggers, riding crops, and paddles of various sizes. The belt is the one I enjoy the most. It hangs just inside the closet door, always a reminder to Amy that she needs to toe the line. I take the buckle part of the belt and wrap it around my hand about half way and I use the end of the belt to redden her ass.

Where would you both like to travel if you had heaps of money and time, anywhere in the world?

I would go get an over-the-water bungalow in Bora Bora Tahiti and Amy would wear a wicked weasel micro bikini.

Do you read Amy's blog whilst you're away, so you can see what she is up to?

Yes I do.  I love to see what she's thinking and I think the interaction between Amy and her blog friends is beneficial to us. It is great to be part of a society of like-minded people.

Sunday, March 13, 2016

My Obsession with Eric's Cock

Have you ever decided to go on a diet and suddenly, the one thing you cut out becomes this incredible obsession that you can't get off your mind no matter what you do? That happens to me with chocolate. The minute I decide to cut sugar out of my diet, the chocolate monster comes to life and I am unable to focus without that sweet dark chocolaty goodness. I become an obsessive M-E-S-S.

Well, one minor surgical procedure that warns "no sex" for three weeks later, I am suddenly cock obsessed. Eric used the dreaded word "no" on me the other day when he insisted I recover rather than partake in his sexual pleasure. I got to watch, but not play. Now I can't get him out of my mind.  I see the bulge in his pants and start to salivate. When he's in the shower, I want to join him and run my soapy hands along his shaft, bounce his balls and slide my finger up his starfish.  I purposely tell him sexy tales in hopes of watching him grow hard, stretch out the wrinkles right before my eyes. Ahhhh, I love his cock.

I went to the grocery store to feel practical and wifely, unlike the brazen little slut bursting inside me.

The vegetable aisle caught my attention, though traditionally I'm not a veggie fan.

The English Cucumber; circumference is close, a bit thin, but way too long.

The pepper, nice light color though a little on the yellow side, is way too curved. Starting to sound like Goldilocks here.

Then, of course, we have the zucchini. Width looks good but the length is a bit shy, quite a bit. :)

Our final candidate, a Chinese Eggplant. Oh my, check out that tip.  My tongue is a huge fan of the upside down V on the underbelly of Eric's shaft; the eggplant wins. It is straight as an arrow, the circumference correct, the V is nestled in place at the tip... we are so having this for dinner tonight.

At the stove, my mind goes back to the last time I watched: thick white salty liquid oozing out from Eric's slit as I stroked his balls, fingered his ass and admired his technique. 

And the time before that, when he rode my ass, shoving his hot hard cock in and out of the starfish while pulling my hair with one hand and spanking me hard with the other.  

And prior to that, me on my knees in the bathroom while he brushed his teeth before work. I placed my lips around the tip and let my tongue dance in and out of the upside down V, before diving down the entire shaft, playfully bouncing his balls and sucking until he exploded in my mouth, pulled out and decorated my face with his magical cum.

Ahhhh memories. Who says I'm obsessed? I am just trying to make a healthy meal. ;)

Squish Squish,

PS- It's still March. Ask us questions! You've got Eric in town for a few more days and I'm always here. What would you like to know?

Saturday, March 12, 2016

Therapeutic Figging: Really? Uh oh.

I served Eric dinner and his phone went off; work needing him to take yet another ten day trip.  As he listened to the details, I placed my hands on his shoulders and tried to massage away the previous travels.

Eric's muscles feel as though they have calcified. It doesn't matter how hard I pound my fists against them or press my palms into them, Eric is tied in such a tight knot, his body won't let go.

"Will you promise to do something for me this weekend?" I ask.

"What do you want?" he answers suspiciously.

"I want you to promise to do something for me without knowing what it is. You know I love you and wouldn't ask for anything crazy. You trust me, don't you?"

The slippery slope here is Eric takes care of everyone and everything in his life; except himself and he frequently blows off any suggestions from me to do so. I don't want to come off as being pushy and I certainly am not trying to take control of him but damn it's aggravating when I just want to be a good partner, help him with the mundane things and spend some quality time together. It's so frustrating when he won't let me do things with/for him!!!

"Make an appointment and spend a day at the spa," I request.

Not much of a reaction on his part, so I got a little bit loud and maybe even a tad mouthy.

"A direct order then, Eric! Get a massage, sit in the sauna, and give your body a chance to unwind before another road trip."

(Perhaps the word "fucking" appeared between the words "another" and "road" but I'm not entirely sure. It may have just been in my head.)

Eric's response was merely, "Thank you for caring."

Does that mean yes? Do I need to force the issue? Make the appointment for him?

UGH!!!!! Quit being a MAN and let this girl help you out. The truth is, Eric takes amazing care of me, better than anyone I've ever known. I just wish he would do the same for himself.

That was last night. Eric got up early and went downstairs so I decided to blog about my frustration before joining him.

"Glad you're up Amy," Eric greeted me with a kiss and led me to a seat at the kitchen counter. "I heard everything you said at dinner and this morning, made an appointment for tomorrow. You are right, my back and shoulders are tighter than they've ever been and I do need to take better care of myself."

I smiled and blew a kiss to him. Finally, the guy did something for himself and admitted, I am right.  :)

"The travel is taking it's toll," he continued, "and I have never been in a situation like this but I am determined to get through it. It doesn't help, young lady (I recognized that tone and suddenly realized what Eric had sitting on the counter between us) that I can't be here to make sure you are behaving. You, my dear, are just as guilty of not taking care of yourself."

My eyes got big and I swallowed before attempting to stammer out a response. "But I, well, I just, you know."

Eric shook his head and picked up the ginger and the paring knife. For almost thirty minutes I was instructed to "sit still and look pretty" (his play on my new favorite song "Sit Still, Look Pretty" by Daya) while he whittled away, shaping the ginger to fall somewhere between our two plugs in both shape and size.  As he meticulously molded his creation, he calmly discussed my indiscretions.

"Recovering," he began, "means sitting still, lying in bed, letting your body heal."

I won't drone on about how I walked 3 miles to the store, cleaned out a storage area in the basement, went grocery shopping in the middle of the night: all less than 48 hours after being knocked out on the operating table... I get anxious if I slow down. What can I say, I don't do slow well.

Eric continued on about how badly I deserve a spanking, one that he won't forget to deliver, but one that will need to wait until I'm fully recovered.

The completed ginger plug was held in front of my face by it's proud craftsman. "And then you had the nerve to give me a direct order?!" Eric's eyes sparkled when he said it and I knew he'd been conjuring up his carving scenario for awhile.

"This little beauty is going in the freezer," Eric always does his research. I guess the darn thing will keep for quite some time. "and when that pretty little ass of yours is ready, Miss Amy is going to learn the difference between 51 and 49 percent."

Eric wrapped the organic plug in plastic and cleaned up his carving area. He seemed a lot more relaxed than yesterday and as much as I hate to admit it, my bottom tingled in anticipation.

I've done the research as well.


Friday, March 11, 2016

ttwd - how long? A question from Jan.

Jan's question:
I would like to know how long you and Eric have been at ttwd? Whose idea was it in the first place?

Hi Jan!

Thanks for the question. 

All readers, it's only a third of the way through March so bring them on!  :)

Eric and I were married three years before we talked about or discovered we both have a thing for him spanking me.  I was on my own (with kids) for over ten years and when I got overwhelmed, would self discipline to keep going. One day, I admitted my secret motivational technique to Eric and it turned out, he was very interested in hearing more. He did a lot of reading, researched DD, and we spent hours and hours talking about what would make the most sense in our relationship. I'm pretty independent (hard to tell with all of my whining) and Eric is attracted to that side of me so being in a master/submissive kind of role didn't really work for us. However, ttwd gave more room for interpretation so that's how we got here.  I need the resets and Eric is a strong enough partner to want to give them to me rather than have me handling yet another thing on my own.  Punishment spankings - I fantasize about them, thinking the day Eric truly lays down the law, I'll have some cathartic breakthrough and will let go of my entire past, cry in his arms, be forgiven for all of the mistakes I've ever made and breathe. (No pressure there, huh? Poor man. Do you think he knew what he was stepping into with this girl?!) And finally, we have the playful, sexy, tie me down and dominate me fun spankings. We just started this in July. It's only been 8 months. Still learning... ttwd, ourselves and each other.


Thursday, March 10, 2016

Welcome home Eric!

Eric is home and I am reminded of the little things.

He takes off his shoes in the entry and calls out to me when he walks in the door.

His hugs make me feel more safe and secure than I've ever felt before; and his kisses send that sensation straight to my heart.

I get lost in his bright blue eyes and when he talks about frustrations at work,his cheeks go rosy red.

We read the March Questions together today - ask us anything! We've only had two but I've asked nine others and they have all answered.

We snuggled in bed and I read to Eric and watched him get hard.

My finger nails danced along Eric's arm. I love stroking his body, touching him; gentle tickles, soft and soothing.

I pulled his cock from his pants but he told me no. I am supposed to be recovering.

Small surgery yesterday.


I got my man home after eight long days.

He tells me to be still.

I crave his cock.

I want to feel his hot cum pour into my body.

No sex for three weeks.


Eric tells me no. To be still. To recover.  He puts on a video.

I bounce around the bed, kiss his balls, watch as he strokes himself.

I want to play too.

I walked three miles after my surgery; to buy a bag of candy. "Recovery" is not my thing.

Eric's hand flinched today.  I saw it. He mentioned my trip to the store and told me to lie still but at that moment, I knew he would have given anything to have me over his knee.

Darn medical crap.

Anyway, Eric came and I watched. Salty smooth white cum spilling over that special spot my tongue likes to explore.

My fingers played while he came, my head resting on his thigh.  I found a new place to make him smile.

I pretend I can handle anything; that I have a handle on everything.

Safe, with him here, I let down enough to realize how worn out I truly am.

I let go.

Eric tucked me in. Kissed my forehead and I was out.

Three hours.

Sleeping and calm and relieved that for the moment, I am not in this world alone.

Friday, March 4, 2016

Answer to Abby's Question

March is Question and Answer month... ask us anything and we will answer!

Here is a question from Abby: You find a magic lamp..and the genie grants you 3 wishes....but the wishes must be personal peace is not an option...what are your can answer individually or as a couple..

Eric is out of the country until Tuesday so I'm going to have to do an "individual" answer here, but once he's back, it'll be fun to tackle it again as a couple.

I get three wishes - anything I want... the first one is EASY -

Eric lost his father almost twenty years ago but his stories paint the most incredible picture of a loving, ethical, hard working gentleman who truly lived to make the world a fabulous place for his wife and children. There are many tales about the sacrifices he made, the laughter they all shared, the daily grind, the fun trips, the sound advice, the love and support... it goes on and on.  My first wish is that Eric would have one more day with his Dad; a chance to catch up on what has taken place over the past two decades and a chance to walk among the redwoods and be his boy again.  I know his Dad would be so proud of him, not because he has accomplished everything he has ever set his mind to, using the same principles and ethics his father always taught him, but because first and foremost, Eric has a huge kind heart.

The next two are much more selfish -

I would like to dump all of my insecurities and painful past experiences so I can be the carefree, happy, loving girl who is buried deep inside me and who Eric deserves to have as his wife.

I would like to spend the rest of my life exploring the planet and fulfilling fantasies with Eric: we have a list that could easily keep us busy well into our hundreds.

Thanks for asking Abby!


Tuesday, March 1, 2016

March is question and answer month - how fun!!

Apparently, March is the month where YOU can ask any question and it will be answered. 

Feel free to ask either Eric or me anything you want to know. 

We're game!